Jewish Valentine’s Day
Tu B’Av is one of the most joyous yet lesser-known holidays on the Jewish calendar. It falls on the 15th day of the Hebrew month of Av. “Tu” (ט״ו) is the Hebrew numerical value for 15 and “Av” (אָב) is the name of the fifth month in the Hebrew calendar, which is why this holiday is called “Tu B’Av.” This year, Tu B’Av will begin on the evening of August 8 and end on the evening of August 9.
Often described as the “Minor Jewish Holiday of Love” or the “Jewish Valentine’s Day,” Tu B’Av has deep roots in ancient Jewish tradition. According to the Mishnah (Ta’anit 4:8), it was one of the happiest days in Israel’s calendar.[1] On this day, young unmarried women would dress in white outfits and go dance in the vineyards, while the young men would observe and choose a wife for themselves. This joyful tradition, which still continues today, serves as a kind of matchmaking festival, emphasizing purity, love, and hope for new beginnings.
Tu B’Av also marks several significant historical and spiritual events in Jewish history. According to Talmudic sources (Bava Batra 121a), the day was associated with reconciliation, restoration, and new beginnings.[2]
One major event remembered on Tu B’Av is the reconciliation between the tribe of Benjamin and the rest of Israel. After the tragic events of Judges 19–21, which culminated in a civil war, the tribe of Benjamin was nearly wiped out. Only 600 Benjamite men remained! To preserve the tribe from extinction, the other tribes lifted their ban on intermarriage with the tribe of Benjamin on Tu B’Av and allowed the men to take wives from the other tribes. This turned a season of division into one of renewed unity.
Another significant event that, according to tradition, happened on Tu B’Av is the lifting of the restriction on tribal intermarriage. Originally, women who inherited land were required to marry within their tribe to preserve tribal boundaries (Numbers 36). On Tu B’Av, this restriction was lifted, which encouraged more national unity within the tribes of Israel.
Tu B’Av is also associated with the end of the wilderness generation’s punishment. After the Israelites rebelled by believing the report of the spies instead of trusting in God’s faithfulness to bring them into the land (Numbers 13–14), they were sentenced to die in the wilderness for 40 years. According to tradition, each year on Tisha B’Av, they would dig their own graves and lie in them, waiting to die. In the final year, they awoke unharmed. When the new moon appeared on Tu B’Av (one week after Tisha B’Av), they realized the decree had ended, and this was the beginning of a new era for the Israelites and they entered the Promised Land.
Tu B’Av always falls on a full moon. This symbolizes fullness, restoration, and beauty which is very special on this holiday that celebrates love, healing, and divine favor. It stands in contrast to the somber tone of Tisha B’Av, just six days earlier. Where Tisha B’Av remembers destruction and loss, Tu B’Av reminds us that God’s love and redemption endure – and joy will return.
Written by Hannah, Life in Messiah staff
Had you heard of this lesser-known holiday? To see the contrast between Tu B’Av and Tisha B’Av, read last week’s blog.
The Jewish people could use a little “loving” today. How would the Lord have you demonstrate His love to the Jewish people when much of the world is turning their back on them?
Deepening your exposure to Jewish traditions can help you understand their world view and religious beliefs as you seek to share Messiah. Sefaria.org provides ready access to a variety of Jewish sources.